so I suppose you could come to the conclusion that I'm a total freak and you don't want to come anywhere near me. that's fine. I quite honestly couldn't care less. just let me know that's what your plan is. I really hate guessing, it drives me up the wall, across the ceiling, and down the other wall... multiple times. I know I have different views on life than a good portion of the world. and that I don't exactly like to talk to people when they talk about their views and I can't relate in the least. call me a bitch it you want, that's your word for it, not mine. I won't fight for anything that isn't worth dying for. plain and simple, if it isn't worth dying for, why the fuck should I bother fighting for it? I'm a lazy ass and I won't do things without a purpose. unless it's fucking up, I see to do that quite well. if you can't get over my little screw ups even after I try my hardest to rectify the situation, why are you worth my time? most of my life I've found it easier to just complain about all the things that suck instead of just being happy with life. I'm FUCKING ALIVE!! that should be enough. although in this day and age in order to be allowed to be happy you're supposed to be 'successful' in the sense that you make a shittonne of money, get almost unattainable grades, and have a tiny little model body. stoopid fucking box that society is forcing us all into. so what if I don't care about money? I'd rather make a difference and just barely scrape by. so what if I'm failing 3 classes and in danger of repeating the grade? teacher's ways of marking my achievements aren't the only opinions that matter. I know I'm bloody brilliant, and no one can take that away from me.
for all the kidlettes and such who think they're so cool because they can't be bothered to type entire words out, FUCK YOU! ..with a horse-sized dildo. you are a huge part in the fall of the english language. you make yourselves seem incompetent and useless. and most of all, you don't even care about what you are doing, you aren't even using such things to make a statement, just to fit in with the new generation of stoopidity.
school. oh dear fucking gods. you need to get you act together. if you honestly think you can stick 20-30 kids in one room with one teacher trying to cram bullshit into their minds in only one way of learning, you are sadly mistaken. the worst part is, most of these teachers aren't even bothered enough to get to know their students and help them learn in the styles that they actually get stuff. instead they decide to write them off as the 'bad' kids. and then they wonder why kids skip class, fail tests, don't do homework, and create as much trouble as possible in class. maybe if the system took each student's needs into account, allowed them to have a personalized learning plan, maybe then they would see good results in the schools. as it is, they are setting the world up for failure. the school system is failing the kids or today by using the thought process of yesterday. a new plan for education needs to be thought out, and fast.
I know I live in a shit town, go to a shit school, and inhale bullshit like a fat kid inhales cake after a crash diet. I'm starting to be okay with that. I have a few good people to get me through it. I refuse to be completely shoved into the box. I create a new way in life for myself and there's nothing that could possibly stand in the way of that for more than a few seconds. I am strong, independent, and I will be happy. I am alive. I can breathe. I can feel. that's more than most of the world can say for themselves. so I will learn to treasure every moment. even if those moments are ones spend by myself, pinning hopelessly after a girl who may never again return my feelings. at least I have dreams.
so guys, honestly, you should really let my know what songs you think my post titles are quotes from. either comment on the post itself, or hit me up at nikkiasb@hotmail.com
<3 <3
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