he just can't wait to get back to routine, although grade 12 scares the shit out of him. he longs for the days away from the bitch, day where he gets to see her almost every day. but the family will force him into dresses and heels until he ends up a soggy mess on the floor of some dress store changing room. he doesn't quite know how to tell them all that he wants a purple tailcoat. he doesn't know how to tell them to leave him alone to try and figure shizz out. he doesn't understand what his mind is telling him. yes, he is a boy in a girl's body, but he feels like he's a boy who wants to dress up in all sorts of crazy, girly things. he wants to start transitioning so he'll look like all the other drag queens. there's just too much gender-bending to make sense.
he needs long hours of sleep to get back to a place where he physically can be in the creative zone and fill a few pages of sketchbook or something productive like that. it's about time he do something besides mope about and complain about not being able to do anything. he just needs to sleep..
the blood and the gore turns him on. he lusts for the pain, yerns for the scars. everything about the the mythical world he loves, vampires, faeries, werewolves, unicorns, mermaids, monsters. mostly the vampires. the blood, the sexuality, the pale skin. long before sparkly half-assed vampires were the teenaged girl fantasy, he's been a slave to their culture. ever since he was first bitten he has been addicted to it all. anything dark, undead, supernatural he tends to float towards. then there's just the kinky fantasies....
<3 <3
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