I'm dying to be with you.

he can't help but to notice all the steps to becoming more of a dork he has taken for her. it's a little unsettling, how one girl has changed so much in his life in such a short amount of time. he wants to know what would've happened without her, but at the same time he never wants to let her out of his sight. there are entire arguments, arguments he has made himself to why there is no way in hell they could ever work. there's just something inside him that wants to give it a chance to defeat all the odds. he wants the chance to sort through the mess of feelings and have someone tell him if they're real or not.  the winter is creeping in on him and the only source of warmth seems to be the sleep he keeps fighting off. he doesn't want to miss a thing, yet the season is just trying to fuck him over. he swears it to be so. the cold of the night takes over and he tries to succumb to the thresholds of rest, much to the dismay of his wondering mind. nothing more can be done to prevent the takeover. he keeps imagining mistletoe. he's never really had a proper mistletoe kiss. he doesn't remember having any at all, although he's bot completely certain if that is due to repressing memories or just the fact it never happened. he waits for a girl to change that all. now of only there actually was some mistletoe... <3 <3