I'm sorry I'm coming home.

he missed having work to make his life seem a little more complete. his first shift in a month or so and he loves every moment of it. every time that he gets away from his mother in the outside world it's beautiful. he missed the independence of going to work and being able to do things without thinking about what consequences his mother would have for him not following every single unspoken rule she has. being able to go out and breathe and earn some money and such is a fucking great feeling. makes him want to go out and do things that she won't really know about when she's not looking so he can live a real life. he's still needing a jacket for winter formal and it's less than a week away. fuck, he needs to get makeup and stuff too. if he can get shit together so that he can make it out to the mall before dress rehearsal and pick up a few things that would make his entire existence so much easier.  new technology. it makes him all happy and giddy. really, it's a horrible thing. he'd become addicted to everything that is technology and the new era of life. he's been drawn farther and farther from what he can call a life he can respect. no matter how much he tries to stay that same person he's been working towards becoming, the world likes to fuck over his attempts so that he ends up being someone that is the complete opposite of anything he'll ever want to be. EVER. so he burns more incense and prays to cat that something will change, something will give him the courage to repent from the bullshit of  the society and take a different view on everything no matter how hard it is. then there's school, the place where those bullshit ideas are being hammered into his head like there is no other existence of ideas besides that. it actually really saddens him. on the other hand, he loves being able to do thugs with the simple touch of a fingertip to a screen. he loves how easy contact has become, how he never has to really talk to people when it makes him anxious. he thanks humanity for such inventions, even though they go against so many things he stands for. the conflictions in his head just confuse him to pieces.. <3 <3