as the days fly by, he realizes all the events are getting so close. then he realizes he doesn't have a date yet and most of his friends have already agreed to go together. things just keep on moving even when he isn't ready for them to happen. it really hits him how much different from what he thought this year's events will be. he should have been at SDSS boat cruise, should be going to SDSS winter formal, and should be going to SDSS prom and dry grad. not only is he not going to the events, but he's not going with the girl he'd said he would from grade 9, and not wearing the right clothes. in a way , his dreams have been shattered.
he's groping around in the dark, trying to find the switch to get to normalcy. someone seems to have hidden it again. he can't remember the last time things seemed real, that he could feel emotion when learning about serial killers, that he could gain any motivation to do anything. then again he doesn't even know what normal is anymore.
one final day to get through before he has to try and get everything done in the midst of the craziness that is camp. he's actually starting to get more excited about this weekend, more than he ever thought possible. just hoping the weather holds up so he can maybe try to learn to skateboard. he knows there's a good chance he'll just spend the whole weekend of free times in club coco chilling with books and lattes and pouring over themes and essays and such. apparently the only thing he needs to be working on is Engliosh. highly enjoyable homework for the most part. just lit makes him a little unsure if he can stay afloat in the class.
it may be time for him to b doing another wardrobe raid. somehow he knows there are many things he never wears no matter how much he love. girly clothes just don't seem to fit into his style, although he keeps them around in case he needs them for movie shoots. they take up space for almost no reason whatsoever. he just needs to clear it all out.
<3 <3
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