my heart is on fire.

he stares at the pile of homework before him, wishing it away. he wishes for just one weekend to do whatever the fuck he wants and not have to think about what would happen after it. he wishes that everything would magically work out so that he could have that piece of freedom. instead it seems that more and more piles on so that he has no chance at getting everything done. so he complains and deals with the headaches and begs for it to all end. he learns to sleep even when his thoughts are in 100 places at once. although it isn't really a real sleep with the amount of trade offs. he hopes that no one notices the way that even when he's just woken up and supposed to be fresh, he feels like a hammer just came down hard on his head. he tries to forget, make it go away, but each thought stays with him for as long as they can. somehow he knows that it would just kill him faster, that it isn't healthy at all. but all his heart tells him is yes. he doesn't know how to make the heart forget that it completely loves every moment of her. he tries to make his mind think of anything else. he's waiting for the perfect outfit, the perfect timing. <3 <3