I laugh myself to sleep, it's my lullaby.

summer school day one. fuck. I already get a few questions wrong on homework. how the fark am I going to do well on the quiz on it tomorrow morning? just three more days this week.. and only two days of learning, Friday being test day and all. why does math have to be so hard? I get the general concepts, but the numbers fuck me up and I end up making all sorts of stoopid mistakes and I have no idea where I went wrong. this is exactly why classroom setting does not work for me. I need someone to work through it with me one-on-one. just hoping I can squeeze by with a pass for this summer. tests aren't worth as much though. tests are like.. 40something %, quizzes another like... 30something, and the rest is homework. but if I can't even do all that well in just the homework I might've screwed... the bitch says to stay after and get help, but I don't know what I need help on. it's just random mistakes I shouldn't be making and I don't know how to catch. I know basically what to do, just don't do it step by step every time and forget what I'm missing...

pride stuff. so for sure going in the parade. with Sydney and maybe Amos. trying to get other people to go to. only problem is that the tsawwassen crew going, is going with darsey. meaning they won't go in the parade (makes sense since it's her first pride) but also, awkwardness for meeting up after. should I be trying to repair our friendship at least one more time? but I've been trying for six months and gotten nowhere, so really it's up to her now. this is just tiring. just got over one of these awkward things that lasted over a year. about a year and a half. now there's still this one. and it's been over six months for something completely minor compared to with ferring. if he can want to be friends again, then she should be able to suck it up. just really hoping this doesn't try to ruin my pride. 

still have no idea what to do. guess I'm winging it. improv romance. hoshizz, prepare for overflow of cheese?? is it bad that I'm this nervous? I just want everything to be perfect. but what is perfect?

<3 <3