today was nightwolf's funeral. I honestly have never seen so many kids in one place besides school and we day. he touched so many people's hearts and the ceremony didn't leave a single dry eye, even people who didn't know him but went to support friends. I honestly think that it was a good representation of his life and who he was. and this is coming from someone who had only shared a bunch of times at lunches and breaks having a smoke. honestly, outside times at the pit I never really saw him. but he was such an amazing person that even knowing him that little was an honor.
I can't believe it was only 13 days after he was dignosed. and abdominal cancer there's only a 1/10000 chance of getting. he was unique like that. everyone knew him, everyone loved him. may he rest in peace. or rest in paradise as many are saying.
after that whole emotional time eventually got to my mom's coworker's saladmaster dinner. it was great. so many vegitables in cake, but it still tasted completely like cake. and after dinner we all sat around with arfican tea (which was freaking amazing) and talking about things. I was the only one under 35, but I felt so at home there. I could contribute to the conversations and could relate to the things they talked about. I actually felt smart and peaceful and like we were all equal. there was no judgement, no arguing, just the sharing of information and a good time. sometimes I actually enjoy the company of older people better because of that. there's none of the teenaged drama or angstyness. everyone has lived enough to just be accepting and enjoy the company. it's beautiful. if everyone could be like that people would learn so much from each other in PEACE instead of fighting over money and comparing to each other's status and all that other bullshit that doesn't matter.
when it comes down to it, once you're gone none of that matters, but the person you were and the way you treated others will last for an eternity. so why don't we all just live in peace and forget greed and judgement. let's all live and love and be free.
it's going to be hard to come back from spring break and go back into such a hostile enviroment. go back to where people are judged about everything and grades are second only to how "cool" you are. I'm done with highschool. I'm ready for peace. I'm ready to learn on my own terms instead of being force-fed useless information. I get the need for education, but it's just that the school system goes about it all wrong. even if they do want to teach everyone all the subjects they could at least have different classes for people who learn a simular way being all together. also, they try to keep everyone as open and accepting as possible but they are hypocrites. they judge students based on school system failures. it's time they learn how to teach the generation of the future in a way that would allow for a better tomorrow.
any questions, topic ideas, themes, etc??? hit me up and let me know. guess the songs from my post titles??
email: nikkiasb@hotmail.com
facebook: Nikki Oreo Barnes
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