all confidential.

he's dealing with things. he doesn't even seem to notice that it was Easter all fucking day. no attempting to get the whole family together for dinner and his great aunt being away in Australia at work is good. he never liked holidays anyways. if only there was a way to get the cheap after-Easter chocolate with the first-on-shelves selection. he's so ready to shove his face with chocolate and forget his worries.  like any other sudsy night he's bombarded by porn. kinky, fetishy porn. just another thing to remind him that in a week he'll be able to say that it's been exactly 2 years since he's had sex. he's been trying to find himself in ways where he isn't giving up more than he receives, he doesn't have to settle for something purely physical that he doesn't care about instead of having the emotions and the butterflies and the cutesy cuddles. the ability to actually love those who he tries relationship-y things with far outways the moments of meaningless, emotionless sex. he's proud of himself for waiting around to find people who he can love and have an actual attraction to. maybe as a reward he won't have so many things to be so confused about.  <3 <3