he wants to go through all the piles of everything and get rid of all the crap, it gets on his nerves just sitting there. he also knows he doesn't have the motivation to get off his lazy ass and do anything about it. it's been a year, moving from place to place. he still doesn't know how to sort through it all and seperate things that hold the memories he needs and random crap that has no meaning. slowly he filters through it all, getting rid of more and more each time, but he wants to do it all at once and have the open space to walk, to organize, to be able to close his closet for once. soon enough he'll be off to find his own place and trying to have as little as possible to be lost to bad roommates. he needs to get it down to the basics, he just needs to learn to let go. he may not be as productive as he could be, but there's just too much emotion to be able to deal with everything at once. he has the emotions of a girl, as much as he hides it and tries to make everyone else believe he doesn't have the emotions.
he looks around and he doesn't recognize anything. the room is just another in a slew of many that he has gone through in the year, the furniture and most decorations he has far outgrown. he should be scrapping it all and starting afresh, although he is just to afraid he will not be able to actually afford such big changes, that he cannot find himself enough to pick such things out. so he'll start small.
he is in hiding from the heat, from the sun. he has gotten to the point that happens every summer where he just loses connection with people and goes so far into himself he has a hard time recognizing other people, they all seem so far away. he longs for a human connection, but none of them last long enough for him to get the full effect. he has a hard time trying to realize that all these other beings are humans just like him, they feel, they breathe, they think, they are not plastic. once again he will start off the school year completely socially awkward.
<3 <3
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