I need you to keep time, just snap those fingers for me.

boys, you're nice and all, but I'd rather fuck your sister. 

it makes me happy how many people have stopped being clones of everyone else and gone on to have their own way of life, their own soul. it's great. yes, society is trying to force us all to be emotionless, working robots. thankfully there are enough people that are finally telling society to fuck off that this will hopefully change soon. the nerds, the rebels, the non-conformists, the artsy folk, we're all taking over. and there's nothing society can do to stop us. 

I want to go around town by myself in the middle of the night and have a long, deep conversation with everyone I pass. the strangers you find at that hour are the most interesting people you will ever meet. people who have lived a little, people who have an epic story to tell, people who've been through more than you can imagine. I used to sit at Tim hortons between the hours of 12midnight, and 4.30am. the people I met there are beautiful, they are unique, and they have helped me to apriciate everything that I've had the chance to do or see. lately, I've been forgetting all of this and just complaining about my life as if it were the only bad thing happening in the world. I need to spend some time with some new strangers, learning about new stories, and feeling their pain so I can once again remember just what exactly I have and what I should be thankful for. the sad thing is my mother does not aprove of my being alone at night and she has never aproved of a single friend I meet then. it's like she wants to keep me in this little 'teenager' box of self-obsession and immaturity. 

I have gone backwards. I used to know what the world meant, what to do out in the real world, how to cope. I used to be fueled by will to succeed. I lost all that. I have become sheltered and spoonfed. like a wild animal who has been brought into captivity and raised to the point where if I were released I might die out in the wild.

I try to see only the best in everyone. until they have done something unforgivable to either me or my friends. even then, I try to see change and give them another chance. I see the potential for beauty in the world and try to restore it. sometimes I have too much faith in humanity and they fuck up and let me down. but I keep on dreaming, keep on wishing. I sit awhile with the homeless man on the corner, give him what change I can afford, and talk, hoping he can trust me enough to tell me his story, what brought him to that exact corner where I happened to pass. out of all the corners and all the people, it comes to this. this is coincidence. 

I want her to be able to look at the world the same way, give me a chance I don't deserve, to let me change FOR her. because no one is perfect, no one's idea of perfect can be perfect for everyone, and for love we all try to become the one we love's idea of perfect, whatever that may be. although we both call ourselves 'realists', both see the scars in the world for the most part for what they are, the difference is, I sometimes see the world as totally glass full, unless my heart is not whole and my world in glass drained of everything including air. I just need a little love. and a little guidence. 

drop me a line, give me a topic, ask me some questions (for the blog or just for personal gain), and guess the name and artist of the song from the post title.

<3 <3